This is a favorite photo of me and my Eric.  It was taken in Donegal, Ireland at my brother and sister in laws wedding. How time flies.  We had such a great trip to Europe that summer.  Eric and I loved exploring and I am so grateful for our many adventures.  

Thank you for showing me the world Eric. 

While I have loved the blogging world, I know that for me, right now, I need to focus on my own healing since Eric as passed away.  Our sons too are grieving and they need me more now than ever.  So friends, it's time to retire a spoonful of dish.  Thanks for being a friend.  I'll see you around. 

 xoxo

miles fisher - don't let go

for you eb
via

                                             
miles fisher is genius
experience it here

I can't believe you've been gone 3 months.  I miss you every second of everyday.  I love you baby! 

what i am thinkin

all images via pinterest

Posted via caringbridge and now sharing with my followers.....


With much love, this update is by Rita Baumgartner (Sarah's sister in-law, married to Eric's brother, Marc).

We never expected to write this so soon, but wanted to update all of those who have loved and supported Eric and Sarah so much during this difficult, but brave battle with cancer.  Eric went peacefully with Sarah and Marc holding his hands and talking gently to him yesterday evening just after 7.00pm.  

After being admitted to the hospital a couple of weeks ago in hopes of having surgery that would make him more comfortable and prolong his time with us, Eric's surgery last Tuesday brought unfortunate news. The surgeons could not even attempt to remove the tumors or any part of them as his cancer had advanced so rapidly and completely that it was too dangerous to remove them.  Dr. Nakakuru (his surgeon) informed us after the surgery and confirmed that there were no treatment options left for him.  Eric came around from surgery and was his old self, so happy to see his family.  On hearing the news the next morning, Eric arrested and had to be intubated (put on a breathing machine).  He was taken to ICU where he remained until last night.  Eric was able to wake from sedation twice a day, so his Mom, Dad, close family members and good friends were able to spend a few precious minutes with him.   Although Eric was intubated, he was aware and responsive with blinking, gesturing and even some writing during the times he awoke from sedation.  Sarah and Marc cherished every single second and got to tell him everything in their hearts. While Marc and Sarah spent pretty much every minute in his ICU room, his sisters & brother in law kept a 24 hour vigil in the waiting room, sleeping on a hard floor for a few hours each night just so they could remain close to him.  Although our hearts are breaking, it's comforting to know Eric knew he was surrounded by family, good friends and much love. 

We will have a memorial service for Eric on Saturday, 23 July to remember the wonderful husband, father, son, brother, friend he was to all of us. Please see details below:  

 Church:          Holy Family, Citrus Heights

Address:         7817 Old Auburn Rd, Citrus Heights, CA 95610

Time:         10:00am

Dress:         In honor of his favorite color, please wear blue (any shade) and black to the service instead of all black

A reception will be held immediately after the service at 360 Esatto Place, El Dorado Hills, California 95762.  Bring your happiest fun memories of Eric.

The support and love he and his family received through this very difficult time has made a huge difference.  Sarah and their boys will need our support for many years to come.  We look forward to seeing many of you on Saturday to celebrate Eric's life.  Knowing him made us all better people. 

Thank you for all of your kind words, prayers and thoughts. 

a month ago i bought this dress on roxy. within 24 hours i was informed it was out of stock. ugh.

earlier this week i was online and decided to see if the dress was back in stock on roxy. no luck. so i googled it and up popped sports chalet. they had this beauty in stock so i snagged one quick.  i love it's casual bohemian feel. during summer i prefer dresses to shorts. i really don't like to wear shorts. 

if you're still with me, great.  thanks too for sticking with me during my blog dry spell.  everyone tells me i cannot lose site of my outside interests.  it's easy to say when your husband isn't the one fighting cancer.  love them for encouraging me though.  

shimmer

via

i want this dress. 

will i get this dress

probably not

why

it's by badgley mischka

regardless

i love this dress

She's a star

Today my Harper's Bazaar arrived in the mail and I was pleasantly surprised to see Britney Spears on the cover. She is looking gorgeous in this Dolce & Gabbana star gown. Don't cha think?


Her summer tour kicks off in Sacramento, CA which I am right next to so I debating if me and my sistas should go. The tickets are a bit high so I can't decide.
Are you a Britney fan? What's the most you'd spend or have spent on a concert?


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random

via & via

How adorable is this ABC's wall?  I love how original and fun it is for any family or kids rooms. 

buy yours here

Recently I purchased the pottery barn kids book kids' rooms and it is filled with creative ideas for decorating your kids rooms, similiar to the abc wall.  If you are on the hunt for a book about kids spaces then I highly recommend this book. 

We had a great Memorial Day Weekend.  You?  We had family in town which kept us busy and distracted.  The boys loved playing with their cousins and I got to fit in some girl time with my sis in law at a local wine bar.  It was yummy wine, delicious cheese and great company.  Thanks Rita!  

Also, this weekend my hubs and his bro launched our boat and parked her in her new home, the dock at Browns Ravine at Folsom Lake.  It only took 5 1/2 years of waiting for this spot but we are beyond excited to be able to use our boat this summer since it will be so much easier. 

Since the weather has been a bit chilly we all didn't go out on the boat with the kids but will soon. 

How was your weekend?  Do you waterski or is that not your thing?

A quick trip

Here's the view from our hotel room at the Marriot in Salt Lake City, Utah.


We are here for my hubbies work, he's participating in a trade show and I tagged along. I got to help work the booth yesterday which I actually enjoyed. Following the show we had a quick break to change then headed to the Market Street Grill in downtown Salt Lake. It was good and the strawberry shortcake was so yummy!
We leave tomorrow and although I've enjoyed our trip, I cannot wait to get home to our boys. A big thanks to grandma for watching them and making sure they are having a blast.

Only bummer of the trip, I was hoping to visit Alice Lane Home but discovered that it is in Orem Utah. Maybe next time.

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Outdoors in

The other day while browsing online through Calico Corners I came across this gorgeous Ikat print fabric and decided it is the perfect fabric for my chairs.  I have been wanting to make slipcovers for awhile but didn't know what fabric to do it with and now I know.  I love the idea of being able to wash them because as most know things get dirty especially with kids.  I have been loving this table for a while but didn't feel that it would ever work in my current home.  But since we are moving soon, I think in a smaller kitchenette this table is the perfect compliment and affordable.  A few pops of yellow pillows are a fun addition as well as good back support.  As for the table scape, I find this flatware caddie rustic yet functional and perfect for indoor or outdoor entertaining.  I love me some tea in the summer and this white drink dispenser is a much needed addition to easy entertaining.  As for a center piece, this galvanized metal 3-tier stand is chic yet practical and makes it easy for all to grab a snack and go.  I am a sucker for seasonal dinnerware and the Calypso Target collection is no exception.  These tumblers are beautiful with their trio of colors and the plates are whimsy and durable which is a must for young families.   

How are you bringing the outdoors in this summer?

What some of the yumminess above?

Pier 1Parsons dining chairs

Pier 1Yellow accent pillow

Calico Corners Ikat Fabric

Ikea Round Table

Calypso Home for Target Tumblers

Target Drink Dispenser

Calypso Home for Target Plates

Pottery Barn 3-Tier Stand

Pottery Barn Flatware Caddie

challenges

via

I have been wanting to share some news with you all but hadn't been able to until now.  If you've followed my blog for awhile then you know that my husband Eric was diagnosed with cancer back in February of 2010.  Following surgery and six months of chemotherapy, we were told in November of 2010 that Eric was cancer free with a 50-90% chance of his cancer not returning (depending on which oncologist you spoke to).  Fast forward to March of 2011, Eric hadn't been feeling well and was having unusual pain.  Due to this, his oncologists decided to push his PET/CT scan and other tests forward to find out what was causing his pain.  The results were shocking.  In a few short months they found that Eric's cancer had in fact metastasized and was in his small intestine, stomach, colon and peritoneum.

Within days of this news and visits to his oncologists at Stanford and UCSF, Eric's doctors recommended chemotherapy for three months followed by another round of scans to see if his chemotherapy is working.  If the chemotherapy proves to be working then he will continue on his current course of treatment with Flofiri (leucovorin/fluorouracil/irinotecan) and Avastin (Bevacizumab).
If it is not working then they are going to treat his cancer like you would pancreatic cancer since it has shown to be effective for patients where the colorectal treatment proves ineffective.  Eric has Duodenal Cancer of the Small Intestine which is very rare therefore there is not an exact treatment for it.

To date, Eric has completed five rounds of his chemotherapy with his sixth round starting tomorrow.  Again, following this round we'll know more which we hope and pray will be that his tumors are shrinking and the chemotherapy is doing it's job.
As for how my hubbie is doing.... this round of chemotherapy has proven much harder with crappy side effects, basically the scariest thing imaginable (to quote my hubbie).
So, I ask that you please pray for my husband Eric.  Please pray that his tumors are shrinking.  Please pray for his continued strength and will.

If you want to know more or follow his cancer journey then stop by his Caring Bridge site here.

My reason's for explaining this is that our life is really hard right now and as much as I want to enjoy your blogs and blogging, I am finding it more challenging to do so day to day.  I will post as much as I can but it will be sporadic for now.

Please feel free to share our story because our family needs all the prayers and positive thinking coming my hubbie's way.

Hugs my friends.  See you soon.

Jake and Ryan are the cutest, most loving lil men ever and I am a better person because of them!  Everyday I am reminded how lucky I am to be their mom.

Happy Mother's Day to my mom who is my inspiration.  I love you mom. 

AND

Happy Mother's Day to all the awesome momma's in the world!  

Our lil family as been on holiday but we are back with lots of stories to share. 

See you back here tomorrow my lovelies! 

the it list

Happy Friday ladies... I hope you all have a fabulous Easter weekend, whatever it brings to you.  "Hop" on over to these fab blogs for plenty of spring inspiration!

• strong sense of style gives color blocking a try... it's so fun and easy!  And really? What feels more properly spring than pink and green together?
• a spot of whimsy has some fabulous eye-candy from the movie Water for Elephants.  Please tell me you have read this book... if not, do it stat, the movie opens this weekend and it looks to be amazing! (find a spot of whimsy on twitter!)
• thought and musing wears a simple and elegant maxi skirt for some wine tasting... a perfect outfit for what looked to be the perfect day!
• good clean fun shares her favorite childhood cupcake recipe... angel food cake with strawberry frosting.  These look SO good and definitely what childhood memories are made of! (find good clean fun on twitter!)
• the capital barbie finds some fun accessories with bold angles... this bracelet stood out as a favorite for me.  Pop on over and see her other finds! (find the capital barbie on twitter!)
• good tots rounds up maternity poolside looks for summer, including this adorable peach polka dotted maternity swimsuit!
• rose a la mode sports this fun yellow and white striped dress and seriously has me craving more stripes. Is that possible? (find rose a la mode on twitter!)
• a spoonful of dish reminds me that flowers never disappoint in the inspiration department. Just looking at them I can feel that summer is closer!
• a little dash of ash will brighten your day with some good old fashion gorgeous guys.  Good looks never get old (sigh). (find a little dash of ash on twitter!)
• lady m says what we are all thinking lately: we can't get enough of Zara.  Check out the inspiration and some of their (very interesting) backstory over at her blog!
• meet virginia design is sure to put some spring pep in your step with this fun mix of bold colors and florals.  This outfit just screams sunshine! (find meet virginia design on twitter!)
• mama loves papa's daughter is quite the fashion prodigy!  Just look at these adorable items she (or her mama, either/or) picked out for herself! (find mama loves papa on twitter!)
• rebecca with an r proves that blazers never, ever get old... at least in my book!  I just love the simple sophistication of this look! (find rebecca with an r on twitter!)
• good life for less is color crushing on purple + blue + white for spring. It's such a simple color combo - check out her looks! (find good life for less on twitter!)

the it list is produced each week by jill of good life for less... click here for information on how you can be involved!

Flowers

The latest issue of Martha Stewart is all about flowers.


From fields of mustard flowers that are endless in their natural beauty.


To a desk draped in floral wallpaper.


And last, decorating a table scape with a bright and beautiful bouquet of poppies.

We are so fortunate to have so much natural beauty surround us every where we turn. Next time I am outside, I'll be sure to stop and smell the flowers.


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a day in monterey

Recently we spent some time in Monterey California.  We stayed at the Plaza Hotel which was luxurious and relaxing.  We strolled on the beach and played in the sand.  Of course we visited the Monterey Bay Aquarium.  The boys loved every minute of it.  It was a perfect mini break for our little family. 

Any mini breaks planned for you?

Btw, things have been complicated recently so I haven't much time to blog.  I miss reading all of your blogs and will return to devouring them all soon.