challenges

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I have been wanting to share some news with you all but hadn't been able to until now.  If you've followed my blog for awhile then you know that my husband Eric was diagnosed with cancer back in February of 2010.  Following surgery and six months of chemotherapy, we were told in November of 2010 that Eric was cancer free with a 50-90% chance of his cancer not returning (depending on which oncologist you spoke to).  Fast forward to March of 2011, Eric hadn't been feeling well and was having unusual pain.  Due to this, his oncologists decided to push his PET/CT scan and other tests forward to find out what was causing his pain.  The results were shocking.  In a few short months they found that Eric's cancer had in fact metastasized and was in his small intestine, stomach, colon and peritoneum.

Within days of this news and visits to his oncologists at Stanford and UCSF, Eric's doctors recommended chemotherapy for three months followed by another round of scans to see if his chemotherapy is working.  If the chemotherapy proves to be working then he will continue on his current course of treatment with Flofiri (leucovorin/fluorouracil/irinotecan) and Avastin (Bevacizumab).
If it is not working then they are going to treat his cancer like you would pancreatic cancer since it has shown to be effective for patients where the colorectal treatment proves ineffective.  Eric has Duodenal Cancer of the Small Intestine which is very rare therefore there is not an exact treatment for it.

To date, Eric has completed five rounds of his chemotherapy with his sixth round starting tomorrow.  Again, following this round we'll know more which we hope and pray will be that his tumors are shrinking and the chemotherapy is doing it's job.
As for how my hubbie is doing.... this round of chemotherapy has proven much harder with crappy side effects, basically the scariest thing imaginable (to quote my hubbie).
So, I ask that you please pray for my husband Eric.  Please pray that his tumors are shrinking.  Please pray for his continued strength and will.

If you want to know more or follow his cancer journey then stop by his Caring Bridge site here.

My reason's for explaining this is that our life is really hard right now and as much as I want to enjoy your blogs and blogging, I am finding it more challenging to do so day to day.  I will post as much as I can but it will be sporadic for now.

Please feel free to share our story because our family needs all the prayers and positive thinking coming my hubbie's way.

Hugs my friends.  See you soon.

looking forward

Hi Friends... Please pardon my absence here at my lil old blog these last few days.  I've had a lot on my mind.  One year ago today my husband Eric was diagnosed with cancer.  Whew I said it.  It's hard saying those words still and even writing them.  At times I cannot believe what a year it has been and I am in awe of Eric for what he has endured.  Cancer is no picnic folks, it sucks as well as sucks the life out of you, literally.  So, today I am grateful for my husband, my little boys and each day we have to share together.  I am looking forward to the future and trying with all my will to not always look to the past.  It's much easier said than done, trust me.  As I was looking for a picture to share with you all I stumbled upon pictures of Eric from when we first realized something was really wrong with him,  to the day of his surgery.  Here is the timeline.. It might seem long but it wasn't.


Tuesday, February 16th - Eric to the ER as he was no longer able to hold down food and was only able to eat liquids and his vomiting had become severe and very painful.  The ER doctor was amazing.  He called a local gastroenterologist and informed him about Eric and asked that he see him first thing the next day.
Wednesday, February 17th -  We meet the wonderful Dr. R who ordered an immediate group of tests, endoscopy/colonoscopy.
Thursday,  February 18th - Eric has his procedures started but under conscious sedation.  He ended up being a danger to himself and the doctor so they could not complete the exam.  Another appointment was scheduled where he could be heavily sedated.  We both found this rather funny....
Friday,  February 19th -  Eric now under complete sedation, Dr. R is able to perform the said procedures at our local hospital.
Monday,  February 22nd  -  Eric's local oncologist (Dr. J) who we have yet to meet has him have a CT scan at our local hospital.
Monday, February 22nd -  Eric's gastroenterologist (Dr. R) calls our home number at about 5 pm and tells me over the phone his findings from the endoscopy that he found a cancerous mass in the first part of the small intestine the duodedum.  After I speak with Dr. R I go to Eric's office at our home and tell him he has cancer.
Tuesday,  February 23rd - We meet with Dr. R and go over the results and he suggests that we go out of the area to find an oncologist who can perform the surgery that he thinks will be necessary.  He then works with Dr. J who finds Dr. N. 
Tuesday,  February 23rd - We get the call from Dr. N that they'd like Eric to come to San Francisco the next day to meet Dr. N a surgical oncologist who specializes in Eric's very rare cancer.
Wednesday,  February 24th -  We head out to UCSF, Heller Diller Cancer Center to meet the much esteemed Dr. N.  We meet Dr. N and after reviewing Eric's slides he is concerned that Eric could go into cardiac arrest since his mass is blocking so much of his intestine.  By this day, Eric could no longer keep water down.  He wanted Eric to go to surgery right then and check himself in.  Eric asked if we could go home and spend a few hours with our boys.  He gave us the green light of about 12 hours, so we headed home, talked with the boys who were confused and sad like any 2  and 3 year old would be.  The we packed up everything we would need for a few weeks at the hospital.
Thursday,  February 25th -  Eric and I head into San Francisco for his surgery to remove his cancer.
Thursday, February 25th - late afternoon, after a 6 plus hour surgery Eric is wheeled into his room.  Eric's surgery was a success.  Dr. N removed his cancerous mass, 12 inches of his small intestine and 9 lymph nodes where the cancer had spread.
Eric's recovery was really hard on him and us actually but in the end we powered on and are stronger for it.  Towards the end of March we met with two oncologists Dr. C from UCSF and Dr. F from Stanford to get the course of treatment they believed that Eric should follow now that he was finished with his surgery.
They both agreed that Folfox (leucovorin, fluorouracil, oxaliplatin) would be his chemotherapy drugs and he would receive 12 cycles over 6 months.  During his chemotherapy, Eric had to visit the ER several times from side effects of the chemotherapy, the scariest being a pulmonary embolism.
In October Eric finished his chemotherapy and he has been slowly getting back to normal.  Although he has some challenges still, his fingers and toes are numb from the neuropathy from his chemotherapy as well as a few other things.  For the next four years Eric will continue to be monitored by his doctors every few months through blood work, CT scans and a other various tests.  That being said his cancer journey is just that, a journey.  
I know, it's a lot of information but I felt compelled to share it today, whoops I am past midnight now.


On a side note, the above picture was taken of Eric and I on our last trip to Donegal, Ireland.  It is a beautiful county and country and we were so taken with the beauty as well as the people.  This year I am going to post a bit on our travels as Eric had I have really seen the world these last few years and we hope in the coming years to see even more of it.
Thanks for being so great everyone out there reading my lil old blog.  I know this is a heavy post and get it if you don't want to know all this stuff but I needed to share this post today.  I hope to not have much to say about it in the future as Eric continues to remain cancer free.  Although I do plan on posting about people and their families who are growing through cancer and blog about it.  It's always good to raise awareness because we can all forget other's realities if we aren't faced with them.  
So go and hug your babies, your hubbie or your boyfriend, whoever and remember to be enjoy each new day.


Lots of love.....

Pete

It's late and I can't sleep.  Today I learned that our friend Pete died of cancer.  He fought a long and hard fight this past year.  I am honored to know him and to be able to call him a friend.  Pete and my husband Eric bonded during chemotherapy at Doctor J's over their mutual admiration of The Home Depot.  These two men discussed how they wanted to finish their backyards so their wives wouldn't be left with a mess if they died.  I cry every time Eric tells me that, one because no one should have to think that and two because they did.  Pete was a husband, father and a friend.  His larger than life personality was intoxicating as were his stories.  Pete definitely told a good story.
A week before Christmas I ran into Pete's wife Missy at Costco were we discussed the lunch our husbands had planned for us all the following Tuesday.  Tuesday came and while my mom watched our boys, Eric and I headed to lunch to meet our friends.  We arrived around 11:30 am and waited for Pete and Missy to arrive.  After a bit, we decided to be seated and wait for them at the table.  We called Pete, texted Pete and no response.  Eric paced and walked around looking for them while I waited in the restaurant.  Once we realized they weren't coming I cried and Eric was shook up.  We knew that we wouldn't see Pete again and it hurt.  On the way home that afternoon we decided to drop off the wine that we had brought for Pete and Missy at their home.  Eric went up to the door and placed the wine on the ground and when he looked up there was a sign on their door that read "FOR PETE'S SAKE, DON'T KNOCK"!  Always a joker.
Pete you will be missed and remembered always.  I know that you are smiling and laughing way up there.
See you again someday.

Free at last!

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Our life right now is a game of catch up for me and my family.  

We are fortunate that life is getting back to normal now that Eric is finished with chemotherapy and officially CANCER FREE (we got the news yesterday)!  It has been a long 10 months since Eric was diagnosed with cancer and we/I have a lot to take care of in the coming weeks.  

That being said, I need to take some time off my blog.   

The giveaway I have planned for this week will be when I return in two weeks. 

Take care my friends and see you soon! 

positive thinking

friends, tonight i am feeling all nostalgic and thinking back on the years... listening to taylor swifts new album.  a must buy and the song - never grow up, makes me cry every time. sappy, i know, sorry but i am in a mood, be warned.
i've been meaning to introduce you to our newest family member.

jasper the cat - he's puuurfect

 my boys & best buddies, Jake & Ryan

my ry guy as a baby..... sadly all of jake's baby pictures are not on my mac, will add soon!

totally off subject but tay tay's in the pic, i am loving this bow shirt. you?

back to my boys, aren't they cute?

this week i still plan on posting pics of my weekend... why?  the hubs and i celebrated our 6 year wedding anniversary. the destination, the Ritz Carlton - Lake Tahoe. it was a great evening with the hubs and reminded me yet again i am the luckiest lady! i love you Eric! 

speaking of the hubs, he has a ct/pet scan tomorrow to check things out. we are thinking positive folks that he is cured of his cancer and their is no looking back so these tests are just mere formalities.  please prey and think positive thoughts for the hubs and our little family.... thanks! 

back to happy posts soon, promise! 

a little update

I will

to

because

Friends - please excuse my absence as of late. I will continue to be post off and on for the next month.  Why?  I am focusing my time on my husband and my kids.  My husband Eric finishes chemotherapy next month and we are full of hope that he will be cured of his cancer.  I cannot wait to begin this new chapter in our life that continues to be full of love, happiness and one that I can share with my husband each and everyday. 

1/2/3

why

Last week was good, really good.  I got in loads of family time and took care of almost everything on my To Do's list.  The preschool social was a success and Jake had a great time.  I am reluctant to post a picture since all of them include Jake's classmates and I do not want to upset any parents.
My mini procedure was a success and I am heathy as a horse which is fantastic because I have been concerned as of late.  When I awoke Friday night after a full day's sleep (heaven),  I received some sad news that is still on my mind today.

My husband Eric has a best friend also named Eric. Eric has three kids whose youngest is an adorable little girl named Taylor.  On Friday evening, Taylor was diagnosed with Luekemia. By Saturday, she began her 1st day of Chemotherapy which she will repeat everyday for the next 6 months.  Taylor is 4 years old.  Everytime I think of Taylor and what she and her family will endure, I cry.
Marc is my husbands brother.  Marc's best friend from college has three boys, two who are twins and an adorable 3 year year old Ronan. Ronan was diagnosed with Brain Cancer this past week and had surgery this weekend.  Again when I think of what Ronan and his family will endure, I cry.
Please say a prayer for each of these families and their little babies, who are enduring more than any child should have to.  Thank you!

My Man

Today I was hanging out with the hubs while he went through his 7th round of chemotherapy which means we've passed the halfway mark!  So, with 2 1/2 months left in his chemotherapy cycle I am full of hope.  During his treatment today we received the good news that his 2nd Pet scan showed no abnormal growth in his body. This solidifies that the chemotherapy is doing it's job.  After Eric's 1st Pet scan they located a lymph node that was inflamed which was concerning since they thought they removed all the cancer during his surgery in February yet the doctors assured us not to worry because the chemotherapy would shrink it and it has.  I've set up a CaringBridge website for the hubs and still working on the specifics but if you're curious about Eric's progress you can read more here.

I tried blogging on my iPad today and Safari couldn't support blogger in full, meaning I could only write a post not add pictures.  Has anyone figured out how to use their iPad and still blog?  I ask because we spend up to 12 hours at Eric's chemotherapy appointments over a three day period and it'd be great if I could use my iPad more. All suggestions welcomed!

Eric and the boys at Hetch Hetchy dam last week

P.S. Eric I love you.  You're the best partner and daddy!

good start

Close to my house is this adorable and delicious Strawberry Stand.  

In addition to strawberries they sell, red onions, garlic, snap peas and this week, cherries.  

Since I've decided to make some strawberry jam today, I loaded up on them yesterday.

On a side note, a big thank you to my friend Kim, for bringing over the yummiest dinner last night.  It was a Tropical Island Pork Salad and I couldn't stop eating it, seriously.  I'll have to get the recipe and post it, if it's ok with her.  Having dinner brought to us, made our night easier and we are moved by everyone's kindness and generosity. Thank you all so much!

Earth Day & other stuff

Happy Earth Day 

What are you doing to celebrate Earth Day today?  

Our family works on the following everyday to help our Earth . 

1.  Recycle - all cans, plastic, paper, glass

2.  Reuse - grocery bags, clothes and cardboard

3.  Reduce - the hubs just replaced our light bulbs with energy efficient ones. 

We recently purchased an energy efficient dishwasher, 

as well as energy efficient washer and dryer

4.  We planted 4 new plants this past weekend and plan on planting even more plus a few trees.

5.  I am currently replacing all of my cleaning products with eco- friendly ones.  

The only product I am having trouble changing is my Tide.  

Any thoughts on eco-friendly laundry detergent that is as good as Tide?

6.  Food - buying organic food and from local farmers markets. 

Does this cake looks yummy or what?  

I am thinking that I'll make it for Ryan's 2nd Birthday in June.  

Therefore, I am on a mission....

I want to take the ingredients for the Rainbow Cake found here and 

replace them with healthier alternatives..  

Any suggestions are welcomed and I'll let you know what I use to switch up this recipe. 

Why?? 

First, the hubs has Cancer and we are revamping our kitchen to make it Cancer friendly.. 

What does Cancer friendly mean?  

No sugar, no processed foods, basically yummy foods that lessen the impact of side effects from chemotherapy, improve his appetite and immunity as well as overcome changes in his sense of taste.

Second, our kids eat too many processed foods these days and I want to make everything they eat as healthy for them as possible.

Do you have any yummy yet healthy recipes that you'd want to share here on A Spoonful of Dish? If that is a yes, then email me at aspoonfulofdish{at}blogspot{dot}com.  

{Images found here & here}

These are the days

Today, the hubs, is having another surgery - to put in his Medi-Port that will aide in administering his Chemotherapy treatments which begin next week.  I've written about his cancer here & here.  Sometimes, I feel as if this isn't our journey to be had because we are so young and not deserving of this but no one is and so it is. 

Eric is strong, full of hope and will which makes him unstoppable.  

As we forge on this unknown journey this song keeps playing in my head.

These are the Days by 10,000 Maniacs

these are days you'll remember

never before and never since, I promise

will the whole world be warm as this

and as you feel it, you'll know it's true

that you are blessed and lucky

it's true, that you are touched by something

that will grow and bloom in you

these are days you'll remember

when May is rushing over you with desire

to be part of the miracles you see in every hour

you'll know it's true, that you are blessed and lucky

it's true, that you are touched by something

that will grow and bloom in you

these are the days

that you might fill with laughter

until you break

these days you might feel a shaft of light

make its way across your face

and when you do

you'll know how it was meant to be

see the signs and know their meaning

you'll know how it was meant to be

hear the signs and

know they're speaking to you

to you


{image found here}

life goes on

This is a big week for my family.  My three year old Jake, starts soccer. I can't believe it!! Yesterday I was holding him in my arms and today, I can barely pick him up he's so big. My heart is a wee bit sad. I'll make sure to post some pics of him and his buddies trying to figure out how the game of soccer works. 

Before that though, the hubs and I are making a trip to the beautiful San Francisco.  Have you all visited?
We'll begin our journey with shop talk, actually the hubs will with some local clients. Once that is finished we're off to our hotel in the city. Where we'll I'll quickly throw our bags on the floor and promptly head out to the fabulous Union Street/Marina District, my go to place for shopping and eating while in the city.
We'll begin our shopping at Lululemon, since I am in dire need of their amazing groove pants and then go from there.  Although my real focus is enjoying the day with my husband, Eric.

Following our day of fun, will be a day of news. We are heading to the city to meet with my husbands Oncologists. The first meeting of the day is with Dr. N, the surgical oncologist, who I am forever indebted to for taking care of Eric.
Then we'll meet his oncologist, Dr. C, who will go over his chemotherapy and any other treatments that he recommends at this time.  We have a million questions to ask about his cancer and hope to learn a lot from this visit.
Every time I write that word cancer, I still cannot believe this is happening to us.  What a whirlwind this last month has been. I know it might be too much for some people to read about on my blog and I understand. My husband is my life and his strength and love inspires me everyday. To not share this part of my life would make my blog not real, at least for me.  If any of you partake on this journey with us, I hope you can find some inspiration. Even if it's just to laugh more or to live life in the now.

I hope your Monday is off to a beautiful beginning.



{image found here & here}

a new day

Has your life been touched by Cancer? On February 22nd, mine was. My amazing husband and father to our adorable little boys was diagnosed with Adenocarcinoma: Cancer of the small intestine.  I had mentioned that the hubs had been sick but little did we know how serious.  
Since Eric's diagnosis life has been a whirlwind. Eric was referred by his Gastroenterologist to an Oncologist then to a Surgical Oncologist within two days.  Day three we met the surgeon who upon reviewing Eric's CTscan wanted to admit him to the hospital immediately for surgery.  We told him we needed to go home, get things settled, take care of our boys and could be back early the next morning. So on Thursday, February 26th at 10:30 am my husband was wheeled into surgery.  Eric's amazing doctors say they got it all which is a blessing, since he could no longer eat or drink prior to surgery due to the tumor blocking a part in his small intestine. 
It has been a hard road, for Eric, my sons, myself and our family and friends.  Everyone rallied and friends came as far as New York to visit the hubs. He is loved by many. 
This past friday we returned home from the hospital after 8 long but successful days of recovery. My husband received the best care by the top doctors and nurses in this field and we are forever indebted to them for their kindness, patience and amazing care.  
We have months ahead before this battle has been won but we prey that we it will continue to make Eric stronger, we as a family stronger and remind us what is most important in life, each other. 
I'll be back when my life gets into more of it's normal routine. 
For now, we are spending as much time as we can as a family, enjoying the simple things. 


{photo by Mike Gellerman Photography}